Glimpse 14 - Get the lead out, knowing when to say when...

I'm a workaholic. I enjoy it. And.. heroin addicts enjoy heroin so it doesn't say much for me now does it? I once subscribed to the thought of - if you are going to do anything, do it well and do a lot of it. Now that I'm running my own coaching organization... not so much. Now I am taking a course on overcoming self-sabotage ... man is THAT ugly.... I sense a change in the wind beneath my tired wings, it's called self care... knowing when, knowing how, knowing what and then.. doing it.


Since I started coaching over ten years ago I have always asked the people who I serve to come to their appointment with a glass of water, a pad of paper and a pencil. When they inform me they have a computer or a pen to take notes with - I reaffirm, I prefer you use a pencil. When they press on with what's so special about a pencil, I tell them the little story of the woman who taught me how to get the lead out.


Renee explained, a pencil; like energy and our attention span has a rather pre-determined use based on it's lead. It has the ability to get dull and need sharpening - just like our energy and our attention span. It has the ability to break, be crisp, clear, smudged... you got it... just like our energy and our attention span. A pencil does have an apex of personal best in it's point (you know, when it writes "just right" for you?)... and again.. you've got it.. so does our energy and attention span. Over use a pencil without sharpening it up and you get pretty much.. nothing. Try to keep using one some time and it will tear your paper, show half of what you wrote, cause you frustration. We won't even start on the eraser part of the pencil.


She continued.....Now the "point" (no pun intended) here, is if your proverbial pencil is dull, and you've passed your personal best, what are you creating in your life by not noticing? It isn't necessarily knowing "what" sharpens your lead, (although helpful) the question is "when" do you notice you are becoming less effective and "what" shows up to support you in getting the lead out to replenish your energy or refresh your attention span aka sharpen your pencil?


So.. in my welcome letter, I ask my clients to use pencils when they take notes. Part of coaching is about building personal awareness to make better choice for ourselves and that little story is an important first step in comprehending what lays on the coaching path ahead. Knowing when to say when is as critical in life as it is to someone pouring hot coffee in a cup you hold over your lap.


Putting self-care reminders to work for ourselves, ones we use to create awareness and encourage us to support the type of work/life balance we require is important in times of transition. For me, it's a workaholic overcoming the need to work ridiculous hours with no break and slappin on the happy face when I'm exhausted yet still over committed.


For me I have long used pencils at my desk because of Renee's story. I used to have eight of them, now I have four. When all four lay like fallen soldiers on my desk, I get up, get out of my office and do something else for awhile. My goal, by December, is to be down to a two dull pencil limit. My goal is to sustain new thoughts and actions in my self care, ones I want more of for myself.

Self care is an element workaholics, as my dear friend Joy says, "make shit up and believe" all the time. Workaholics also have a rather "all or nothing" mentality... and built within that statement, my NEW thought is yes, get my break time down to two dull pencils AND when the current four pencils I'm using are "done for" I think I may just get the lead OUT of my office with suitcase and fly rod to really practice the change in self care I preach.

Change what you want, when you want, how you want. It's all good. The one that's connected truly to you and your intentional life is just better.